When darkness sets in, fungi much like many other organisms go to sleep, but in mush-rooms.
How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?
A little shaken
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
What do you call the least popular color in the rainbow? The weakest pink.
Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?
It’s a budding romance.
What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job?
Take it or leaf it.
Did you hear about the flower who was struck in a hit and run?
She was leafed for dead.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind full of sand?
A: A rough draft
What do you call an amazing day up a mountain? A peak experience.
Why should anyone experiment with thin ice?
It’s the best way to achieve a major breakthrough.
Many years ago, my grandfather used to cut the grass- but, he's been gone for a lawn time.
That rainbow is so neat, it must be professional gradient.
Q: Why does it smell bad when you destroy fans?
A: Because you’re breaking wind.
I thought I was swimming in the river Thames, but apparently I made it all the way to France before I realized I'm in Seine.
Be careful out there during the snowstorm. It ain't snow joke.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
Two fish are swimming in a river, when one of them hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says: "Dam"
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
I used to search for clams on the beach
But then I pulled a mussel.
What do call a cactus which is shaped like a penis
Dildon’t.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
What is at the end of a rainbow?
The letter W.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
I thought I saw some fog yesterday.
But I guess my memory’s a little cloudy.
Why did the worm cross the ruler?
To become an inchworm
Where do flowers recharge? At a power plant!
Q: Why is it so windy in England?
A: Because Harry Kane (hurricane) lives there..
When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..
It's a current affair.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror!
The river fish went to the library and asked if he can get a book. The librarian said: "You can start by-rowing it."
When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
I was at the beach and saw this guy in the water yelling, “Help, shark! Help!
I just laughed because I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
Never go on a date with a cactus
They'll spike your drink
During a family discussion, my father said that grass is not greener than other plants. No one should make a biased grass-umption like that.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
I'm trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
What do snowmen do on Christmas?
Play with the snow angels.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head because it's capsized.
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
They had us working like dogs at work after a storm
All I did was pick up sticks and bark.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
Why are plants the best chefs?
They’re succulent.
What is the most depressed river in Southern Europe? The Crimea River.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
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