Where do you go to weigh a pie? Somewhere over the rainbow.
I was at the beach and saw this guy in the water yelling, “Help, shark! Help!
I just laughed because I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
What's the fastest thing on the river bed?
A motor-pike and side-carp.
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts.
Love the beach. Can I be any more Pacific?
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
What do you call a negative fog?
A pessimist.
Girls just wanna have sun.
This very fair weather actually makes me feel like a feather!
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
Guess what I do when my ice house falls apart.
Igloo it back together!
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What does Santa Claus say when he flies through a rainbow? Hue hue hue, merry Christmas!
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
Q: What did the tornado say to the sportscar?
A: I’m taking you for a quick spin!
Avoid pier pressure.
In my village, there is a farmer who takes his cows to refill their food at the grass station.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
What do you call someone with Yellow hair on the beach?
A beach blond.
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
I was surprised when I saw a man get struck by lightning.
The man was shocked as well.
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
What do you call the people that you eat grass and produce milk alongside?
Cow-workers!
What did Abel yell to his brother when he noticed a storm coming?
Hurry, Cain!!
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
Why did the leaf go to the doctor?
It was feeling green
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
What did the monochrome say to the rainbow?
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Did you hear about the cow that was lifted into the air by a tornado? It was an udder disaster!
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice
It was cold hard cash.
Q: What's a tornado's favorite game?
A: Twister
What's a king's favorite kind of precipitation?
Hail!
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?
A little shaken
What do you call an amazing day up a mountain? A peak experience.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
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