I was hiking with my friend in the woods and bear attacked him
It was unbearable to watch
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
Why did two fishes go to the riverbank? They wanted to withdraw their fins.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
Where do fish wash? In a river basin.
What did the monochrome say to the rainbow?
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
Who carries out operations in a river? A sturgeon.
What's faster - lightning, light, or diarrhea?
Diarrhea. Because I ran like lightning to the bathroom, turned on the light, but the diarrhea was already there.
Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
A: Leaf me alone
Whale, hello there.
The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.
His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”
He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
What do you call someone with Yellow hair on the beach?
A beach blond.
Lost at sea? I'm not shore.
What is it called when bigger burgers fall from the sky?
Meatier showers.
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
Son: “Hey Dad, can we go to the beach?”
Dad: “Shore?”
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.
I'm trying to keep myself knowledgeable about current events.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
How do you learn more about spiders that live in the rainforest? Check out their web site!
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
My sister said I would never be able to make a beach pun.
Is seashore about that?
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
What did the teaching tree do when it went overseas? It took a leaf of absence!
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
How one snowman greets the other one?
Ice to meet you.
Life's a beach. Enjoy the waves.
What's the name of the funniest mountain range in the world? The Himhilarious.
What did the husband say when his wife told him he bought the wrong flowers?
"Oopsie daisy!"
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
What did the cloud say to the rainbow? Thank you for adding color to my day.
What do you call a storm that doesn't come to fruition?
A mist opportunity!
When you mix a salt and water, you get a solution. When you mix a salt and battery, you get arrested.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?
I guess we'll just have to make dew.
Why are there so many ruts in the ice at the rink?
The maintenance crew must be slipping up.
Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus
They say its bark is worse than its bite.
Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
I was going to make another mountain pun but I can't think of summit.
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for?
Snowbows.
My friend couldn’t pay his water bill anymore.
I sent him a Get Well Soon card.
Having a dirt yard instead of grass is a bold move...
But having a giant rock is boulder.
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