What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
Beach you to it.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section
A pilot friend of mine took the flight exam and flew past a rainbow. No wonder, he passed with flying colors.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
That crazy little sun of a beach.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
The scientists decided to clean up the Thames because it had a dirty mouth.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
It just mist.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
While walking down the plains of the river, I lost my footing and got hit on my head. Now my head is swimming.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
What do you call a weather man that destroys dinosaurs?
A meteorologist
If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head because it's capsized.
My mind works like lightning.
One brilliant flash and it's gone.
The other day I put out a big dangerous open fire!
The other people on the hot air balloon didn't appreciate me for some reason.
What did the man say when his wife asked if he remember to get the coffee with icecream inside it?
“Sorry! Affogato!”
What’s the scariest plant?
BamBoo.
What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?
I guess we'll just have to make dew.
What did the cow that was struck by lightning say?
I'm udderly shocked.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
What goes hiss, swish, hiss swish every time it rains? A windscreen viper.
What's faster - lightning, light, or diarrhea?
Diarrhea. Because I ran like lightning to the bathroom, turned on the light, but the diarrhea was already there.
When the moisture from the sky stops falling
It really stops waning
Dad has a pet snake that eats the grass in his yard.
It's a lawnboa.
Why did the River need Jesus? It was dammed.
Lost at sea? I'm not shore.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror!
The insane amount of rainfall in Poland did not lead the river to flood, all was in Oder.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind full of sand?
A: A rough draft
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
Why do cows eat grass?
I mean, someone has to moo the lawn.
I live on top of the mountain and i usually have 99 problems
But the beach ain't one
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
I enjoy the cold weather
But only to a certain degree.
I installed a sky light in my apartment.
The people upstairs were not happy at all.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
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