What did the Turkey wear on Halloween?
He was a goblin.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What do you call a small Minotaur?
A Minitaur.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
The local vampire society is constantly growing. They are always looking for new blood.
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
Hear about the race between the Yeti and the Sasquatch?
The Sasquatch won, by a big foot.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite love story?
Romeo and Ghouliet!
What's the Kraken gonna give you that'll make you laugh uncontrollably?
Ten Tickles!
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
What do you call a sleeping werewolf?
An unaware-wolf.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
Witches get sore joints because they have broom-atism.
Why did the werewolf laugh while chewing on the skeleton?
He got to the funny bone.
What do you call a zombie DJ?
A dead beat.
How do ghouls like their meals?
Absolutely terrified!
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
Why do trolls live under bridges?
To troll goats!
What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
Vampires can always Count on Dracula.
What do zombies call a battle between classical music composers where one of them loses their mind?
A de-Bach-le.
What's a goblins favorite dinner?
Ghoulash.
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
The best place for a ghost to go on holiday is The Dead Sea.
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
Why do witches fly on broomsticks?
Because vacuum cleaner cords aren’t long enough.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What do skeletons hate the most about the wind?
Nothing. It goes right through them.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
What's a ghost with a broken leg called? A hoblin goblin.
Werewolves love similes and metafurs.
Werewolves love their fast food.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
Why are werewolves better than vampires?
Werewolves don’t have a problem with steaks.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
Why did the Green Giant lay down in the field?
So he could Rest in Peas.
What is a skeleton’s favorite TV show?
Bone-anza!
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
What do you call a witch's spotless garage?
A broom closet.
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