My wife drives like lightning.
I don't mean she drives fast - she hits trees.
How was the misbehaving lightning bolt punished?
He was grounded.
My wife was watching me do some DIY and she said I hammer like lightning.
I never strike in the same place twice.
Did you hear about the soldier who got struck by lightning?
He had to be honorably discharged.
When the AC circuits in your home are hit by a DC lightning bolt..
It's a current affair.
My dad's nickname is lightning.
That way I can tell my friends I've been struck by lightning multiple times.
What do you call a baby tree struck by lightning?
A zapling.
My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...
So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.