Two TV antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married...
The ceremony was boring but the reception was brilliant.
What sound does a vacuum sweeper make when it explodes?
Ka-BROOM!!!
At what point will you love to change your bulbs the most?
When sparks fly.
Where do light bulbs go shopping? The outlet stores.”
It’s crazy that Dubai doesn’t show The Flintstones on TV...
But Abu Dhabi Do!
I get so mad when the heater is on.
I don't know why, I just lose my cool.
What is an energy provider’s favorite dance?
The electric slide.
I can't find my humidifier anymore...
I have reported it misting.
Wife told me that our juicer draws a lot of power.
I explained to her that it takes lot of juice to juice the juicer.
Apparently adding a fireplace to your home is the hot new trend...
...and chimney installations are through the roof!
I'm thinking about writing a book about lamps. I think its a bright idea
What is a wise, old priest's favorite kitchen appliance?
The deep friar.
You’re a unit of electrical energy, Harry.” I’m a watt?”
What did the black pepper say to his wife after coming out of the grinder?
"Don't worry. I'm fine."
What do you call a catholic toaster strudel?
A pope tart.
So earlier I took my clothes from the washer and threw them into the dryer.
I can't be sure how they felt about that, but they seemed agitated.
What's the first tea that comes in a teapot?
empytea
There's a programme about the history of perfume on TV tonight.
It's on at 8pm on Chanel Number 5!
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft?
A Duct-ape.
My mixer broke down today. I'm very sad to part with it, I couldn't have whisked for a better friend.
I stopped ironing my clothes.
I have less pressing concerns.
My wife asked if I knew how to turn on the dishwasher.
I told her I would some flirty compliments.
What do you call a turtle in a chef’s hat?
A slow cooker.
If you think that your phone, laptop, microwave and fridge spying on you is bad
Then you should know that your vaccum cleaner has been collecting dirt on you for a while .
The government is planning to ban articles about ironing appliances in the newspaper.
The freedom of press is no more.
I was holding a bottle of laundry detergent when all of a sudden it exploded, completely drenching my hands.
Oh well. I guess my hands are Tide.
What did the man say after he came out of the walk-in freezer?
"That experience was chilling."
What is a jedi electrician’s favorite tool?
His lightsaber.
I asked my son to stop leaving the freezer door open.
I told him, “This is why we can’t have ice things.”
Did you hear about the guy who fell into the industrial cake mixer?
He's feeling much batter now.
Why did the monk meditate with a light bulb?
He hoped it would help him to reach enlightenment.
If you're stressed, try ironing clothes.
It's a great way to let off some steam.
I just built a car out of a washing machine.
I’ll be taking it for a spin later.
What did the dough say after half an hour in the oven?
I’m bready.
How did the small oven greet the large oven?
He Microwaved.
TV repair during lockdown has been pretty easy.
It’s mostly remote work.
Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..
It came with no attachments.
What is the difference between lightning and electricity. For electricity, you need to pay, but
lightning kills for free.”
A burglar stole all my lamps.
I should be upset, but I’m delighted
The repair man said he thought he'd fixed the propane stoves, but he couldn't be quite sure.
After all, it involved a lot of gaswork.
What does a confident kettle have
Self-e-steam
Why did the lamps get arrested?
They were in some shady business
What do you get if you put kisses in a blender?
A Smoochie.
Why are environmentalists attracted to electricity? It’s natural.”
I put my fancy shirts in the freezer before I wear them.
It's cold fashion, look it up!
Did you hear what the foolish gardener did?
The guy planted a light bulb and though he’d get a power plant.
If you plant a light bulb in your garden, does it grow into a power plant?
Even the heaviest chandelier is pretty light.
I got arrested at work today for moving my desk away from the air conditoner vent.
I was charged with draft-dodging!
Today, I changed a light bulb, crossed a street, and walked into a bar.
My life is a joke.
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