What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
How did the woman react when the doctor suggested she have a brain biopsy?
She gave him a piece of her mind.
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
Which cranial nerve would be right at home in a well-known city in Nevada?
The vagus nerve.
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
Where are neurons put in jail when they commit a crime?
A nerve cell.
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What is the best toothpaste for the brain?
Neural crest.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
What does a zombie say as he squishes your brains between his fingers?
Got your knows.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
A friend of mine lost the right side of of his brain in a car accident, but he wouldn’t stop drinking and driving.
No one in their right mind would do that.
What are the magic words for a brainy magician?
Hocus sulcus.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
Where does a neuron keep its money?
In a brain bank.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
Where do brains go for vacation in Massachusetts?
Braintree, MA
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
How do you decide whether to be a Brain Surgeon or a Novelist?
You flip a coin. It’ll land on heads or tales.
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
What is a neuroscientist's favorite type of dog?
A labratory retriever.
What did the brain say after it got an electrical shock?
"This was a stimulating experience."
What did the axon terminal say to the receptor when they broke up?
I need my space.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
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