The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
Which cranial nerve would be right at home in a well-known city in Nevada?
The vagus nerve.
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and opera?
Because they are very cultured.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
What do you call a skull without 86 billion neurons?
A no brainer.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
What do you get when you cross a "bad idea for using fur" with 86 billion neurons?
A hare-brained idea.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.
A friend of mine lost the right side of of his brain in a car accident, but he wouldn’t stop drinking and driving.
No one in their right mind would do that.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
Where are neurons put in jail when they commit a crime?
A nerve cell.
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
When does it rain brains?
During a brain storm.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
What is a myelinated neuron's favorite type of music?
Wrap music.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
Go to BabaMail
