Which cranial nerve would be right at home in a well-known city in Nevada?
The vagus nerve.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
What do you get when you cross a "bad idea for using fur" with 86 billion neurons?
A hare-brained idea.
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
Why do action potentials make good volleyball players?
They are always spiking.
Where do brains go for vacation in Massachusetts?
Braintree, MA
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
I had a dream I was looking for my brain
But it was all in my head.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
How did the woman react when the doctor suggested she have a brain biopsy?
She gave him a piece of her mind.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
What is a sleeping brain's favorite musical group (rock band)?
REM.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
Have you heard about the guy who made a bomb out of a brain?
It was pretty mindblowing.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
How do you decide whether to be a Brain Surgeon or a Novelist?
You flip a coin. It’ll land on heads or tales.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
What did the brain say after it got an electrical shock?
"This was a stimulating experience."
What do you call glia when it is happy?
Smyelin.
What is a good pick-up line an axon terminal can use on a dendrite?
"Let's connect."
A friend of mine lost the right side of of his brain in a car accident, but he wouldn’t stop drinking and driving.
No one in their right mind would do that.
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
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