Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
What is a neuroscientist's favorite type of dog?
A labratory retriever.
Which cranial nerve would be right at home in a well-known city in Nevada?
The vagus nerve.
What did the mother brain say to her oldest child when it was bothering her youngest child?
It didn't want to get brain-washed.
What do you call a hat for the brain?
A thinking cap.
What is a myelinated neuron's favorite type of music?
Wrap music.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
Why do action potentials make good volleyball players?
They are always spiking.
How did the woman react when the doctor suggested she have a brain biopsy?
She gave him a piece of her mind.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
What is the best toothpaste for the brain?
Neural crest.
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What are the magic words for a brainy magician?
Hocus sulcus.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
What do you call glia when it is happy?
Smyelin.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
What do you get when you cross a "bad idea for using fur" with 86 billion neurons?
A hare-brained idea.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
Where do brains go for vacation in Massachusetts?
Braintree, MA
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
Have you heard about the guy who made a bomb out of a brain?
It was pretty mindblowing.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
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