What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
What is a neuroscientist's favorite type of dog?
A labratory retriever.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
What did the axon terminal say to the receptor when they broke up?
I need my space.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
What is a myelinated neuron's favorite type of music?
Wrap music.
Have you heard about the guy who made a bomb out of a brain?
It was pretty mindblowing.
How do you decide whether to be a Brain Surgeon or a Novelist?
You flip a coin. It’ll land on heads or tales.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
What do you call a skull without 86 billion neurons?
A no brainer.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
What is the name of the Hollywood movie that stars an "outlaw" brain and an "outlaw" woman on a road trip?
Thalamus and Louise.
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
What reassuring advice did the meninges give to the brain?
"Don't worry, I've got you covered."
What does a zombie say as he squishes your brains between his fingers?
Got your knows.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What is a sleeping brain's favorite musical group (rock band)?
REM.
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
What is a good pick-up line an axon terminal can use on a dendrite?
"Let's connect."