happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
What do you get when you cross a "bad idea for using fur" with 86 billion neurons?
A hare-brained idea.
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and opera?
Because they are very cultured.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
When does it rain brains?
During a brain storm.
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
What did the axon terminal say to the receptor when they broke up?
I need my space.
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
What is a good pick-up line an axon terminal can use on a dendrite?
"Let's connect."
What do you call a skull without 86 billion neurons?
A no brainer.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
A friend of mine lost the right side of of his brain in a car accident, but he wouldn’t stop drinking and driving.
No one in their right mind would do that.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
Where does a neuron keep its money?
In a brain bank.
Where are neurons put in jail when they commit a crime?
A nerve cell.
What is a sleeping brain's favorite musical group (rock band)?
REM.
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
What does a brain do when it sees a friend across the street?
Gives a brain wave.
What did the mother brain say to her oldest child when it was bothering her youngest child?
It didn't want to get brain-washed.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
Why do action potentials make good volleyball players?
They are always spiking.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.