Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
What are the magic words for a brainy magician?
Hocus sulcus.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What did the mother brain say to her oldest child when it was bothering her youngest child?
It didn't want to get brain-washed.
What is a myelinated neuron's favorite type of music?
Wrap music.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
How did the mother know her child would become a neuroanatomist?
He was constantly staining stuff.
I had a dream I was looking for my brain
But it was all in my head.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
When does a brain get afraid?
When it loses its nerve.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
What does a zombie say as he squishes your brains between his fingers?
Got your knows.
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
What do you call glia when it is happy?
Smyelin.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
What is a neuroscientist's favorite type of dog?
A labratory retriever.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
What do neurons use to talk to each other?
Cellular phones.
What
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
happens when you bother the parietal lobe?
It gets very touchy.
What do you call a skull without 86 billion neurons?
A no brainer.
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and opera?
Because they are very cultured.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
Go to BabaMail
