What did the maggot say to another?
What's a nice maggot like you doing in a joint like this?
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat?
A dirty kid!
Why is earth worm humor offensive?
They only know dirty jokes.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs!
What do you call it when evil worms take over the world?
Global Worming!
What is a worm's favorite band? Mud.
What eats laptops? Computer worms.
What did the worm say to the other when he was late home? Where in earth have you been.
Why do worms hate graveyards?
They keep bumping into skeletons!
How do worms measure their length?
They ask a tape worm to help out!
Why did the worm leave the Apple?
Because Noah said to travel in pairs
Why was the scarecrow upset with the worm?
It was going ear to ear in the corn field!
Why are worms so easy to get along with?
Because they are always down to Earth.
What do you call two worms in love?
Soilmates.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tell it a funny Halloween joke and see which end laughs!
How can you tell which end of a worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.
Did you hear about the two silkworms that were in a race? They wound up in a tie.
Why did the Archaeopteryx get the most worms?
Because he was an early bird.
What do worms leave round their baths?
The scum of the earth!
What kind of fish do you catch with Gummy Worms?
Swedish Fish.
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you.
What’s a glow worms favourite song?
Wake me up before you glow glow!
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
Why are glow worms good to carry in your Halloween bag?
They can lighten your load!
I felt so guilty after I stepped on that worm this morning. You should have seen it, it looked genuinely crushed.
What do you get if you cross a worm and an elephant? Very big worm holes in your garden.
What reads and lives in an apple? A bookworm.
What type of food do worms like?
Your Halloween Candy!
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python? A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death.
I love eating glow worms
Especially as a light snack
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
How do you make a glow worm happy? Cut off his tail, he'll be de-lighted.
Why do worms have trouble getting up in the morning? Because the early bird catches the worm.
How do you make a glow worm happy?
Cut off his tail, he’ll be de-lighted!
What do you call it when worms take over the world? Global Worming.
Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag? They can lighten your load.
Did you hear about the kid that ate a whole pack of candy worms?
It’s a sour tale!
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? A dirty kid.
When should you stop for a glow worm? When he has a red light.
What happens when fish start an addiction to worms?
They get hooked.
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?
It ended in a tie.
What's invisible and smells like worms?
Bird farts.
What did one glow worm said to the other one?
You glow girl!
Why was the glow worm unhappy ?
Because her children weren’t that bright !
My wife asked why I prefer gummy bears to gummy worms.
I said that gummy worms are beneath me.
I'm going to start a business selling worms and Nintendo consoles
I'll call it "Bait and Switch."
A worm child comes home. It sees mom and asks: "Mom, have you seen dad?"
Mom says: "Dad went fishing with the guys."
What kind of computer does a worm have? A Macintosh.
How many worms does it take to eat a zombie?
It depends on the size of the zombie!
What do worms leave round their baths? The scum of the earth.