What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug?
Pulled pork!
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
How do pigs greet their family and friends?
With hogs and kisses.
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiig!
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pig…
Pig who?
Pig on someone your own size!
What did Mama pig ask her kids every day after school?
“Hoofeels hungry?”
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
How can you tell you’re in a pig wine bar? Because everything’s swine.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.