Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail?
“That’s the end of me!”
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiig!
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet.
I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.