What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!