How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!