What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.