What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.