How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!