Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.