What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?
In the long jump.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
How do sick kangaroos get better?
They have a hoperation.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
Today my son drew a picture of a kangaroo without a body.
I couldn't make heads or tails of it.