A flamingo only ever asks for a plaster when it hurts its pinky.
Have you heard about the new book all about flamingos? Apparently it’s flying off the shelves.
I came across an injured flamingo the other day. I tried to help, but luckily it was already receiving medical tweetment.
There are good and bad times to buy a flamingo. Bad times are when they’re expensive, the best times are when they’re cheep.
Large, pink birds are a good asset to a football team. They’re very used to playing flamingoalie.
How do officials start the races at the pink bird olympics? They say three... two... one... flaminGO!
Flamingos do annoy each other sometimes. Apparently this is because they enjoy ruffling feathers.
Flight allows flamingos to stay safe from predators. This is natural selection in action, and explains why flaminstays are extinct.
Flamingos are pretty good at ideas… They have a lot of experience with formation.
There was a flamingo in our garden for such a long time, we started calling it a flaminstay.
What is the opposite of a flamingo? The answer is, a flaminstop.
Some pink birds can be really rude. I approached a group of them the other day and they screamed “Flamingo away!”
It’s really easy to send a nice card to a flamingo. You just write “Hope you have a flamingood…”
Flamingos are great to go out with, because they all party like flock stars.
Have you ever tried crossing a lion with a flamingo? It will be pink, that’s the mane thing.
How do flamingos clean themselves? They flaminget a shower.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
What part of a flamingo has the most feathers?
The outside.
My wife and I are very competitive, but when it came to flamingo impersonation, I didn't stand a chance
She had a leg up the whole time.
What do you call a flamingo that flew into a wall?
A flamingstop.
I had a flamingo come to stay with me when he had a cold. We nicknamed him phlegmingo.
Why are flamingos the happiest birds? They live with no reggrets.
What is a flamingo's favorite thing to do at the weekend? Play fla-bingo.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
A flamingo can be a really good friend to have. However, they generally fit the bill really well.
What is a flamingo's favorite ride at a theme park? The flamingo-karts.
Why do flamingos make bad pets? They are too much of a birden.
I asked a pink bird who its favourite artist was. It looked at me strangely and replied “Flamingo Starr, of course.”
Flamingos are known by a different name when they dress up to go out – they call themselves glamingos.
I do find that flamingos don’t plan very well for the future… They’re too prone to putting all their eggs in the one basket.
Why do flamingos fly south in winter? Because it would be too far to walk.
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
Have you ever wondered which part of the flamingo has the most feathers? I found out once – turns out it’s the outside.
My flamingo friends are always making me pay for dinner. I find that they can be real cheepskates.
How do pink birds make friends? They fla-mingle.
I once tried crossing a flamingo with a cement mixer. Sounds crazy, but I really wanted a good brick layer.