What part of a flamingo has the most feathers?
The outside.
If flamingos can’t fly, how on earth do they get about? They use flamingo karts, of course.
Our flamingo colleague was leaving for a new job recently. We all told him to flamingo for it.
Flamingoes have a special name for one of their numbers who has passed away. They call it flamingone.
How do pink birds make friends? They fla-mingle.
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
I do find that flamingos don’t plan very well for the future… They’re too prone to putting all their eggs in the one basket.
There was a flamingo in our garden for such a long time, we started calling it a flaminstay.
How do officials start the races at the pink bird olympics? They say three... two... one... flaminGO!
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
Flamingos are great at social events; they flamingle really well.
I came across an injured flamingo the other day. I tried to help, but luckily it was already receiving medical tweetment.
Why couldn't anyone see the flamingo? It was in de skies.
A flamingo only ever asks for a plaster when it hurts its pinky.
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.
Have you ever tried crossing a lion with a flamingo? It will be pink, that’s the mane thing.
Some pink birds can be really rude. I approached a group of them the other day and they screamed “Flamingo away!”
Flamingos are known by a different name when they dress up to go out – they call themselves glamingos.
Baby flamingos really are badly behaved. I think it’s because their parents never put their foot down.
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
Flamingos are great to go out with, because they all party like flock stars.
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
Never take a flamingo to the local swimming baths. They really don’t like claw-rine.
What is a flamingo's favorite ride at a theme park? The flamingo-karts.
I once tried crossing a flamingo with a cement mixer. Sounds crazy, but I really wanted a good brick layer.
It’s really easy to send a nice card to a flamingo. You just write “Hope you have a flamingood…”
Why do flamingos fly south in winter? Because it would be too far to walk.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
Flamingos can get away with the most outrageous behaviour and you’d never know that they were embarrassed. This is because you can never tell when they are blushing.
I have a flamingo friend who has a fantastic imagination, but they are always indulging in flights of fancy.
Flight allows flamingos to stay safe from predators. This is natural selection in action, and explains why flaminstays are extinct.
Flamingos can be a bit of a daring bunch. In fact, they always fly by the seat of their pants.
My flamingo friends are always making me pay for dinner. I find that they can be real cheepskates.
What soccer position does a pink flamingo play? Flamingoalie.
Large, pink birds are a good asset to a football team. They’re very used to playing flamingoalie.
What is the opposite of a flamingo? The answer is, a flaminstop.
What is a pink bird's favorite kind of dance? Flamenco.
There are good and bad times to buy a flamingo. Bad times are when they’re expensive, the best times are when they’re cheep.
What is a pink bird's favorite dance? Flamin-tango.
I had a flamingo come to stay with me when he had a cold. We nicknamed him phlegmingo.
Where is a flamingo’s favourite place to dance? The hop, of course!
Flamingos do annoy each other sometimes. Apparently this is because they enjoy ruffling feathers.
Why are flamingos the happiest birds? They live with no reggrets.
Never trust a flamingo unless you can be sure it has fully fledged ideas.
There’s a new dish out; it’s a cross between a cake and a bird. They call it a Flan-ingo.
Flamingos are pretty daring birds. They like just about anything, as long as it’s eggs-citing.
It’s easy to spot a sad flamingo. They get really blue.
I do wonder why my flamingo friends always do so well in tests and exams. After all, they always just wing it.
How do flamingos clean themselves? They flaminget a shower.
Flamingos are pretty good at ideas… They have a lot of experience with formation.