What do you call a FISH with no Eyes? A FSH.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
How do fish play the drums?
With Fish Sticks.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
What are the fastest fish in the river? The motor-pike with a side-carp!
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
What did one fish say to the other?
If you keep your mouth closed you will not get caught.
Which day do fish hate the most?
Fry-day.
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
I got an email today saying I could win $10,000 in a fishing competition.
But I'm sure there's a catch involved somewhere.
Which murderer kills at the bottom of the ocean?
Jack the Kipper.
Why did the sailor throw a penny into the whale’s mouth?
The sailor thought he was was a wishing whale!
Why are fish so smart?
They are always in schools!
Do you know where you take a sick squid?
To the doctopus.
How do you confuse a fish?
Put the fish in a round fishbowl and tell it to go to the corner.
Where do fish sleep?
On a seabed, and sometimes they vacation at the river bed.
Which sea creatures cry the most?
Whales!
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
Who granted the fish’s wish?
The fairy cod mother!
How does a group of sea turtles make a decision?
They flipper a coin.
I watched a good film about fishing last night.
It had a great cast.
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles!
What do you call a fish that floats on the surface?
Bob.
Where do fish stay on a campsite?
Fish stay in tentacles while they are camping!