How do fish get high?
Seaweed.
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
Where do fish wash?
In a river basin.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
What’s the coldest fish in the sea?
A blue whale!
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
How do you catch an electric eel?
You can catch an electric eel with a lightning rod!
What would you call a jellyfish combat veteran?
A man o' war.
What is the most expensive kind of fish?
The goldfish.
How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
With a golf carp,
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh?
Ten-tickles!
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse?
The Codfather.
What does the Pope eat during Lent?
Holy mackerel.
Why do you bring fish to a party?
You bring fish to a party because they go well with chips!
What fish perform at the circus?
Clown fish!
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
Which fish can perform operations?
A Sturgeon.
Jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not having brains.
This gives me hope for the next generation.
What part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales.
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well armed.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.