What type of dog doesn’t bark?
A hush puppy.
How do you stop your dog from barking in your front yard?
Put him in your backyard.
How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello?
Konnichihuahua.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
My neighbor had way too many dogs.
It’s safe to say that he had a Rover-dose.
My dog has expensive taste in shoes.
So I got her some Jimmy Chews.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
What is the poshest breed of dog?
A Cavalier King Charles Spaniel.
I love walking my neighbor’s dog. It’s the leashed I can do.
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
What happens when you buy a dog from the blacksmith?
When he gets home he’ll make a bolt for the door.
My dog never stands up for himself.
He just rolls over.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
What did one flea say to the other?
Shall we walk, or shall we take the dog?
What dog does Dracula own?
A blood-hound.
What do dogs increase?
The pup-ulation.
Why did the police dog get promoted?
Because he was the scenter of so many drug arrests.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
Why are Dalmatians so bad at hiding?
Because they are always spotted.
When is a black dog not a black dog?
When it’s a Greyhound.
Why did the dog go to the bank?
To make a de-paws-it. But unfortunately, there was a mastiff line.
How do you keep a dog from smelling?
You hold its nose.
What is a dog’s favorite book?
Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer’s Bone.
What was the puppy's costume for Halloween?
The Big Bad Woof.
What type of dog would be the best at portraying Tina Turner?
An Angela Bassett Hound.