What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
What is a baker’s favorite type of icing?
Fawn-dant.
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What did the deer say to his friend during their night in the woods?
This is so much fawn!
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
Q. Which game do hunters go after first?
A. The nearest and the deerest.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.