What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
Q. What did Ena say after Bambi was killed by a semi truck?
A. He will be dearly missed.
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What do you call an eyeless deer?
No-eye-deer.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.