Where do crows type? Crows type on cawmputers.
The baby crow decided to dress up as his favorite vegetable on Halloween, he dressed up as a caw-liflower.
What would a crow wear to the Halloween party? A crown!
Crows prefer carrion, so their bags are never checked at the airport.
My Chinese neighbour said he's just opened a crows shop.
Speaking slowly, I said "you mean a *clothes* shop?"
He says, "No, a crows shop - come in and have a rook."
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
The gang of crows used a crowbar to break into the house.
A crow was arrested under suspicion of murder. The case was closed, as the judge said he had just caws.
Crows hold grudges. They're also fond of eating the dead. Now...
they've been found to copulate with corpses.
NeCROWphilia.
Why was the crow on the telephone wire? To make a long-distance caw.
What do you call a group of crows eating a box of corn flakes?
A cereal murder.
Wondering what crows prefer with soup, crows like crowtons in their soup.
What is a crows favorite vegetable?
Corn on the caawb.
I can’t believe that during the attempted murder, John Crow, Russel Crow and Sheryl Crow were all in the room.
Crowing, crowing, gone.
What did one crow say to the other after the party?
We were raven.
How will a crow with a cold fever sound like? Caw-ph, Caw-ph.
When buying crows for commercial use, always buy them in groups...
That way, you’re guaranteed to make a killing.
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
What do you call a group of politically similar crows?
A cawcus
A sunburned murder of crows is referred to as 1st, 2nd and 3rd degree.
Ever heard of Cawsmopolitan? It is one of the best magazines for crows.
What is a bunch of crows gathering money called? Crow funding.
What do birds like to put in their soup? Crow-tons.
Who brings presents for crows on Christmas? On Christmas? Santa Caws
Two crows land on a park bench.
They were arrested for conspiring to murder.
No, I'm not concerned about crows infesting my house...
It's actually just a mynah problem.
I would rather breed mice than crows
Mischief is one thing, but I don't think I can pull off a murder.
My friend uses a white crow to protect his farm from other crows
He calls it a rarecrow
What do crows read? Cawmics.
Who is a crow’s favorite actor? Russell Crow!
What do you call a group of crows who see food?
A tempted murder.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
Don't give up at this stage, just keep cawing on, you will do great.
What do you call a stoned, dyslexic crow?
A hybrid
A group of crows placed evenly between two margins is definitely a justified murder.
Why did the junkie adopt a one legged crow?
So he could get crow cane from his vet.
How do the crows in Texas greet each other?
Yee-caw
I said some stubtly racist stuff to a magpie
She was a victim of my crow aggressions.
What does a chocolate crow say? “Cacao!”
What do you call a group of dyslexic crows?
A redrum.
How can you tell the difference between an English and French crow?
"PourCUAWWW! PourCUAWWW!"
What’s the difference between a crow and a chicken?
A chicken can crow, but a crow can’t chicken.
The phone rings, and a crow picks it only to find out it’s for her husband. She then says: "Hey John, you have a phone caw."
I whisper my sins to crows
So my parents can't hear me confess to a murder
The scare crow was out standing in his field, so he got awarded as the best employee of the year.
Wondering what crows wear during Halloween, well, they wear caw-stumes.
I saved a tiny baby crow and now he won't leave, I guess you could say he's mi-cro.