Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a crocodile.
A funeral.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
What is a crocodiles favourite dessert?
Brandy snaps.
If a crocodile never admits he is wrong, he must be in de-nile..
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
I told the other alligator to stay outside, he cai-man anyway.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
What do you call it when a Crocodile becomes an Elvis Impersonator?
Crocabilly
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.