The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
I warned farmer Brown not to pamper that cow too much because it would wind up giving spoiled milk.
What South American dance do cows like to do?
The Rump-a.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
What do you get when you cross a cow and an earthquake?
Milkshake.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?
A cow walking backwards.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97
So he rounded them up.
What do you call an evil cow?
De-mooooon.
Why is it a bad idea to give a cow marijuana?
The steaks are too high.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
How do you make a milkshake?
Give a cow a pogo stick.
If you mix a ghost and a cow together, you will create vanishing cream.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
Why doesn’t Sweden export its cattle?
It wants to keep its Stockholm.