Why did the mother cow give the sleepy baby cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
What do you call an evil cow?
De-mooooon.
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because all of the cows have horns
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.