Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.