What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.