What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.