Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
Why don’t chickens wear pants?
Their peckers are on their face.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road?
Poultry in motion.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.