Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
Where do bats go to gamble?
Bat-lantic City.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet? blood-thirsty hacker baby
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
What bat was called an invader?
Bat-talina.
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
What do you call a dream when a vampire bat is chasing you?
A bat-mare.
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
Which bat can hang the highest and longest?
The acro-bat.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
What problem did the young bat experience?
The hangout.
How do bats spend their time?
Flying and hanging out.
What does a vampire bat call a bloodmobile?
Meals on Wheels.
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash? Because he had bat breath.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
What did the grape say when the bat squished on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
How do bats line up in school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
What do you have to know to teach a bat tricks?
More than a bat.
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.