How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
Why couldn’t the fish watch YouTube?
He couldn’t stream the video.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
Why does the river have problems remembering things?
Because she is becoming sea nile.
What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
What can you do if you are the ocean?
Watever you want.
Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
What do you call dangerous amounts of precipitation?
A rain of terror.
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
RIP to Boiled Water.
You will be sorely mist.
My friend couldn’t pay his water bill anymore.
I sent him a Get Well Soon card.
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
You can tell an ant’s gender by putting it in the water.
If it sinks, it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s a buoyant.
R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
Umbrellas.
If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
Why do sharks only swim in salt water?
Because pepper always makes them sneeze.
Why don’t you see an ocean in school?
They just can’t wade through all that homework.
What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
Looking out at the water, a father explains why the ice breaks up in the spring.
The changing sea son.
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
Where do doubtful Egyptians get their water from?
Denial River.
How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
I’m going to start a YouTube channel where I critique bottled water...
It’s an untapped market.
Where do water droplets go to settle arguments?
The Supreme Quart.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I might have some trouble getting hard, I just got laid this morning!
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
My wife first agreed to a date after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.
I Schwepped her off her feet.
How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.