What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
When you mix a salt and water, you get a solution. When you mix a salt and battery, you get arrested.
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
What did one ocean say to another?
Nothing, it just waved.
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
What did one water bottle ask the other water bottle?
Water you doing today?
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
RIP to Boiled Water.
You will be sorely mist.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
What type of baseball player gives out all the water?
The Pitcher.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
A parishioner at my church broke into the holy water tank and splashed some on his infant daughter, saying, "your are hereby baptized!"
That's just not rite.
What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
What did one body of water say to the other?
"Do you sea what I sea?"
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
Why do sharks only swim in salt water?
Because pepper always makes them sneeze.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
What do you call a wet teddy bear?
A drizzly bear.
Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I might have some trouble getting hard, I just got laid this morning!
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.
What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?
Luke-warm.
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
Looking out at the water, a father explains why the ice breaks up in the spring.
The changing sea son.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
What can you do if you are the ocean?
Watever you want.
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a “get well soon” card.
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
What's a flowing water with living organisms called?
A livestream.
If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
Because it’s capsized.
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist