What did the cloud say to the rainbow? Thank you for adding color to my day.
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
I tried playing baseball in the fog today.
It was a bit hit and mist.
I had a rainbow for lunch. I'm trying to eat light.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
what do you call the smaller rivers that run into the nile?
The juveniles
You should dress up warm in the Andes. That place is Chile.
What did the man say when his wife asked if he remember to get the coffee with icecream inside it?
“Sorry! Affogato!”
My wife first agreed to a date after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.
I Schwepped her off her feet.
General: "Fire at will!"
Soldier: "Which one's Will?"
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
I just found out what animal’s been getting into my avocado plants...
It was a guaca-mole.
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner.
A friend of mine asked me to go hunting up in a dangerous mountain range.
I didn't bother because i thought the steaks were too high
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was InTents.
What do you call a snowman that tells tall tales?
A snow-fake!
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
I dropped my cactus the other day
Worst part is, I caught it
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts.
What do you call someone with Yellow hair on the beach?
A beach blond.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
When moving a piece of furniture at the weather station, you'll be needing four casters.
I hate windy weather. It really blows.
The lake did not like the river because it felt that the river was not very lake-able.
How do you keep the snow from giving you cold feet?
Don’t go around BRRfooted!
Why did the worm cross the ruler?
To become an inchworm
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
Why was fog kicked off the football team? He mist a field goal.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
How one snowman greets the other one?
Ice to meet you.
What did the retired pirate say when he went to the beach?
Long time no sea.
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
How did the fire ant feel after the rain storm flooded his home?
Very put out, indeed!
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What always goes up whenever the rain comes down? An umbrella.
There was once a jolly happy mountain that offered fantastic advice to a grumpy hill. "Change your altitude", he said!
Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
What did the man say after he slipped and fell on the ice. Nothing he just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
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