An idea is one of the worst killers of vampires. They don't see it coming, and then it dawns on them.
What do you call a witch who drives badly?
A road hag.
What do you call a bunch of zombie chickens?
The Bu-gawking Dead
Why was Van Helsing so dedicated to killing Count Dracula?
Because he staked his whole reputation on it!
What’s a Spanish vampire’s favorite dance?
The Fang-dango.
Why was the ghoul so smart?
He always ate brain food!
Why are skeletons so good at chopping down trees?
They're LUMBARjacks!
I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-ritto.
How did the archeologists know the skeletons were real?
They were bone-afide.
What do you call a rich goblin?
GOBLING.
What is a skeleton’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone.
On reflection, vampires aren't actually that scary.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What’s a vampire’s favorite cocktail?
A Bloody Mary.
What kind of hotdogs do ghouls like best?
Halloweiners!
What is a witch's favorite ride at the fair?
A scary-go-round.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
Why did the ghoul bury the trophy?
Because he wanted it engraved!
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
How do ghosts stay fit? By exorcising daily.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
What’s a werewolve's favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas!
Did you hear about the person who watched too many Shrek movies?
He ogre-dosed.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
What do you call half of a centaur?
A per-centaur.
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
You can't ever get the attention of a vampire on Halloween. They're way too busy looking for their necks victim.
What did the giant say to Jack when he caught him sneaking around his castle?
"Have you bean stalking me?"
I feel like Medusa was in some rocky relationships.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
Witches are always wand-ering around…
When a big giant eel takes your hand for a meal...
...that’s a moray.
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite Beatles song?
The Ghoul on the Hill!
An Indonesian Giant stubbed his foot on a volcano...
- Did he Krakatoa?
Go to BabaMail
