What’s the best way to woo a math teacher?
Use acute angle.
Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?
His parents wouldn’t Cosine.
Why shouldn’t you let advanced math intimidate you?
It’s really as easy as pi!
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can’t drink and derive…
Why do plants hate math?
Because it gives them square roots.
Never trust math teachers who use graph paper.
They're *always* plotting something.
My girlfriend is the square root of -100.
She’s a perfect 10, but purely imaginary.
What do you call dudes who love math?
Algebros.
Did you hear about the mathematician whose afraid of negative numbers?
He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
How come old math teachers never die?
They tend to just lose some of their functions.
What happens when you hire an odd-job guy to do 8 jobs?
They only do 1, 3, 5 and 7.
Why are obtuse angles so depressed?
Because they’re never right.
Why did the two 4’s skip lunch?
They already 8!
How do you make seven an even number?
Just remove the “s.”
Are monsters good at math?
Not unless you Count Dracula.
How many mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?
One—she just gives it to three physicists, thus reducing it to a problem that’s already been solved.
What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?
"He didn't count on this."
What do you call an angle that is adorable?
Acute angle.
An opinion without 3.14159 is just an onion.
Why should you never argue with decimals?
Decimals always have a point.
What do you call a number that can’t keep still?
A roamin’ numeral.
How do you get from point A to point B?
Just take an x-y plane or a rhom’bus.
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
Why is it sad that parallel lines have so much in common?
Because they’ll never meet.
Dear Algebra, Please stop asking us to find your X.
She’s never coming back—don’t ask Y.
Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?
Because it was over 90 degrees.
Did you hear the one about the statistician.
Probably.
Why does nobody talk to circles?
Because there is no point!
How do you stay warm in any room?
Just huddle in the corner, where it’s always 90 degrees.
A farmer counted 297 cows in the field.
But when he rounded them up, he had 300.
Why did the student get upset when his teacher called him average?
It was a ‘mean’ thing to say!
Where do you bury dead people? Asymmetry
Go to BabaMail
