One or two hours warm my heart,
But 24 hours make my day.
What do you call an Irish dancer having a heart attack?
Michael flatline.
I wish that I could be the coronary artery of my wife so that I would be wrapped around her heart.
"I have a joke about hearts, but I don't think you will get it."
"Why?"
"Because it is an inside joke."
What did the dinosaur say to his lover?
You make my heart saur!
I love my wife with all my butt! I should have to say heart, but my heart is actually smaller than my butt.
My cardiologist friend keeps sending me x-rays of his chest.
A bit weird, I know, but it just shows his heart is in the right place.
Scientist are shocked after discovery of a new african bee species that can keep on flying even after their heart stops.
Local tribes in fear of a zombee apocalypse
When we put our two hearts together, we can’t be beat.
I just found out that my son got a tattoo of spades, diamonds, hearts, and clubs on his arm.
I might have to deal with him later.
Her ex-husband had a heart attack after winning the lottery
But he'd neglected to update his will. She just couldn't bereave her luck!
You must be a defibrillator because you are sending shocks directly to my heart.
Two blood cells can meet and fall in love with each other, but it is all in vein.
Why did the little girl color her paper heart pink rather than red?
She was feeling lighthearted.
I had a birth defect where they had to relocate my heart
I guess you could say my heart wasn't in the right place.
Did you hear about the bear with the bad heart?
It went into kodiak arrest.
What vegetable lives in your heart?
Beets.
You should follow your heart, but keep in mind to take your brain too.