Why were medieval people from Mexico such good engineers? This is because they learned in Aztech!
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
My Physics teacher said I have no potential.
Joke's on her, I just bought a ladder.
What do you call a skeleton in a freezer?
Bone-chilling.
What's a snake's favorite subject to study in school? Hisssstory.
While teaching about the Mongol Empire in History class, our teacher told us, "If anyone Khan, Genghis Khan."
There was this knight who would be always roasting whatever he would catch for food. Guess this is why he was known as the Bonfire Knight.
I once knew a priest that only ate microwave soup.
He was a Ramen Catholic.
What did the dough say after half an hour in the oven?
I’m bready.
In medieval times, what were people who worked in banks known as? They were known as fortune-tellers!
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can’t drink and derive…
Why should you never mess with a Gladiator who knows his English literature?
First he'll bellowulf at you, then he'll shakespeare
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
I spilled some acid on my aluminum fork and it dissolved…
but I didn’t mean to! It was an oxidant.
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
Why did the electricity documentary get such mixed reviews?
People weren’t sure how to feel after it’s shocking ending.
What’s the best way to serve pi?
A la mode. Anything else is mean.
Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
How did the blond define hydrophobic on her chemistry exam? Fear of utility bills.
What did the man say after he came out of the walk-in freezer?
"That experience was chilling."
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
My physics teacher asked, “So why is v-naught 0?”
I replied, “y-naught?”
The government is planning to ban articles about ironing appliances in the newspaper.
The freedom of press is no more.
I wouldn't say I liked the documentary that I had watched on the history of WD-40. It was non-friction.
What did the energy company’s CEO credit her success to?
A series of strategic power moves.
What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
Sorry, that was my fault.
People hated Ho Chi Minh because he was Hanoi-ing.
I replaced all the air vents in my house with smaller ones.
It was a reduction.
I think my heater is sick.
It's hot.
Why are geologists never hungry?
They lost their apatite.
What do you yell at two mummies making out in public?
Get a tomb!
England is the wettest country because many monarchs reigned there for many years.
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles elbow.
After which knight is a town in England named? Sir Rey!
De-coffin-ated coffee is the favourite coffee of the mummy.
If you need an Ark, I Noah guy.
The recipe said, “set the oven to 180 degrees”...
Now I can’t open the door because it faces the wall.
Dear Algebra, Please stop asking us to find your X.
She’s never coming back—don’t ask Y.
In the medieval ages, many knights had to travel throughout day and night. In order to increase their visibility in darkness, they invented a device known as the knightvision goggles.
Is your refrigerator running? I was hoping to vote for it.
What did the nuclear physicist have for lunch?
Fission Chips.
How did brave Ancient Egyptians write?
With hero-glyphics.
A knight bursts into a blacksmith and yells "You smelt my armor!"
The blacksmith was calm and collected and replied: "Yes, and what a lovely scent it had."
What do you call a musician who just saw Medusa?
A rockstar!
It's almost impossible to tell someone if a vacuum works or not.
Either it sucks or it sucks.
My friend pointed at a chandelier and said: "isn't that the coolest chandelier ever?"
I replied: "I don't know if it's the coolest, but it's up there."
Go to BabaMail
