Why does the ocean roar?
You would too if you had crabs on your bottom.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
A red ship and a blue ship collided in the ocean.
Apparently the survivors are marooned.
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
Why do freshwater fish cry so much?
They’re just a stream of emotions.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
I can't believe I can't see the bottom of the ocean.
It's unfathomable.
Why didn’t the two algae ever have se*?
Because they had a planktonic relationship
Did you hear about the Spanish ocean?
Si.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
What does a fish say when he makes a mistake?
It was just a fluke!
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
What did the Ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It just waved.
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
It a-piers we have a problem.
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.