Why don’t you see an ocean in school?
They just can’t wade through all that homework.
I have an exciting new job as an explosives engineer blowing up mountains for tunnels and roads.
It's Groundbreaking work.
What does the youngest flower child say?
Last bud not least!
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waved.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
My wife drives like lightning.
I don't mean she drives fast - she hits trees.
What did Sherlock Holmes say to Watson when he noticed sandstone deposits on the river bank? "It's sedimentary, my dear Watson."
I tried to catch the fog.
But I mist.
Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
When Mr. Mushroom saw Miss Mushroom, he didn’t hesitate to ask her out on a date because he had she was such a fungi-rl.
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
Umbrellas.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
The reason the mountains are hill areas joke gets reposted so often is because it's peak comedy
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
The mountain got promoted because he was at the peak of his career!
My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
Why are mountains always sleepy? Because they n-Everest.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Do you want to hear a joke about a bolt of lightning?
Actually, maybe not. The end is rather shocking.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
I never knew how lightning worked
Thats until it finally struck me.
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
This rainbow is on its last legs, it's really hanging by a red.
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
What did the snowman order at Wendy’s?
A Frosty.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
At the party, the vegetarian girl won’t eat the mushrooms, reason being, somebody told her that they were oyster mushrooms.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
Solving problems in the mountains is easy. It really Alps to clear your head.
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night....
..... oof !!
Where do saplings go to learn?
Elementree school
What did the bride say to her new husband at their wedding? - I love you so mush-groom!
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Last week, I met someone who specialized in the studies of shrubs and grasses. He called himself Neil De-grass-y Tyson!
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