A sheep, a drum and a snake fall down a cliff,
Ba-dum-tss
What happened when the drummer re-recorded his drum solo?
There were repercussions.
I've started a new band called "Blanket'
We're a cover band
Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him, "is that a Fret"?
Have you heard of the band 1023MB?
They haven't got a gig yet.
I was supposed to play the trumpet
But I blew it.
Have you guys heard of the musical group called Cellophane?
They mostly wrap.
What do you call someone that plays Tenor and Alto saxophone?
Bisaxual.
We caught the drummer of our band masturbating over his drum kit...
I guess the pervert thinks of them as s*x cymbals.
What was the pianist doing at the mall?
Chopin.
What do you call a group of killer whales carrying musical instruments.
An orca-stra.
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
Why do saxophone players get so many dates?
Because they have sax appeal
All my neighbours bought the same set of stereos...
When will they stop stereotyping?
My dad just told be a cool joke about drums
I thought I’d snare it with you guys
Which band were way ahead of their time in the stage lighting department?
LED Zeppelin.
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
What is the difference between a drummer and a vacuum cleaner?
You have to plug one of them in before it sucks.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
What did the band Boston say in praise of the Sistine Chapel?
"It's more than a ceiling"
How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They can’t get up that high.
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell.
The police came to arrest me after I tried to play my cat like a violin
They are charging me with Kitty Fiddling.
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Hear about the saxophone player who switched from a tenor to a soprano saxophone in the middle of the concert?
The press made quite a big deal out of his sax change.
What music are balloons scared of? Pop music
My band only plays dog whistles.
You've probably never heard us.
Someone once asked if I ever played the violin
I told him that I had fiddled with it.
C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar.
The bartender says: "Hold it! We don't serve minors here."
What did the drum say about his childhood?
Those were the cymbaler days.
What do you call an 80s synth pop band with a scoop of ice cream? Depeche a la Mode.
What musical group do men join once they get married?
The Hus Band!
What do you call a fishing boat with a great stereo?
bass boat.
What do you call a guitar used to play pool?
A cue stick.
I slapped my violin out of anger, then I got arrested for domestic violins.
Did you hear about the broadcasters in the aeroplane?
They're on air now
I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap.
Why couldn’t the athlete listen to her music?
Because she broke the record.
Silent Violin for Sale
No strings attached.
What do you call a cow that plays the saxophone? A blues moo-sician.
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