I had to borrow my friend’s trumpet because I sounded too good on my own, and people would be jealous!
I didn’t want to toot my own horn.
Did you hear the Islamic music group who covered "I've Got You Babe?"
Sunni and Shia.
How do you fix a broken tuba?
With a tuba glue.
What's worse than a SPIDER on your PIANO?
CRAB on your ORGAN.
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?
Everyone is happy when the case is closed.
What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Something catchy.
If you suck playing the trumpet, that's probably why.
People don't believe me when I tell them I'm the lead singer in a Black Eyed Peas tribute band....
Well I am.
What did the phone say to the radio when they met for a date?
This is AUXhilarating
What happened when the guitars got in a fight?
They got in treble.
What do you call it when there are two nuns in a drum circle?
a conundrum
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
What's better than having roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ....
How are pirates like trumpets?
They murder the high C’s!
What sound drum set from the junkyard makes?
Ba-dump-tss
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
Trumpester: Did you hear my last recital? Friend: I hope so.
My son told me, “The car manual says that I shouldn’t turn up the stereo to full volume.”
I said, “That’s sound advice.”
Did you know Rolf Harris was a talented violinist as a child?
Yeah, he was a mean kiddie fiddler.
Why did the jazz musician refuse to be quarantined?
Cause he was an outdoor cat.
A piano player got arrested at a wedding...
He was trying to root the relatives.
Our church band is just two ladies on percussion...
It’s quite the CoNunDrum
I was supposed to play the trumpet
But I blew it.
I'm starting a death metal band for people with Celiac's Disease
We're called "Gluten for Punishment."
Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.
What is a pianist’s favorite cheese ?
Mozzartrella.
I listenend to the football game on the radio. It was being broadcast on a catholic satellite radio station.
So I tirned to my dad and said, "That's weird. Football isn't even that religious of a sport!"
My dad replied, "Nope. Lacrosse is!"
What is Jehovah's witness' favorite band? The Doors.
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
Wanna hear a joke about a staccato?
Never mind, it’s too short.
I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
One of my ancestors was once hired by Henry VIII to teach his son to play the trumpet
He was a Tudor tooter tutor.
How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog?
The dog knows when to stop scratching.
Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?
Sleigh-er.
I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia that makes me deny the existence of certain 80's bands.
There is no cure.
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
The best gift I ever got was a broken drum...
You can't beat it.
What instrument do English people play?
The Anglo-Saxophone!
What do you call a cow that plays the violin?
Moozart.
I'm 6'6", 280lb, and I've played piano for 23 years
I'm a huge pianist.
What's an owl's favorite rock band?
The Who
What do you call a fishing boat with a great stereo?
bass boat.
What do you call a berry that plays the trumpet? A tooty fruity!
Go to BabaMail
