Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?
Take their genes down.
What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexics Association.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped in his toe? Mitosis.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
What does a biologist wear when they're going out?
Designer genes.
Did you guys hear about that 14-year old virgin girl who got pregnant after receiving the flu vaccine?
Sounds like an inoculate conception.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
How do you know your dehydrated? You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
What did the Endoplasmic Reticulum say to the Golgi. I like your body, and the Golgi said it's complex.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
Organ donors really put their heart into it.
Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
Serotonin and Dopamine: Technically, the only things you enjoy.
What do you call the leader of a biology gang?
The Nucleboss.
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon? He caught the garter snake.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
Biology - It grows on you.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel?
That's a moray!
How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
Bacteria is the only culture some people have.
What is the reproductive area in South America? Spermatagonia.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
Do you find bone puns humerus?
Working on lab science animals is a real rat race.
Two red blood cells met and fell in love, but alas, it was all in vein.
Hey why Are The Viruses All Gone? Cause They "flu" AWAY.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
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