What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
What key has legs and can't open doors? A Turkey.
What do you call an turkey with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
The turkey says, "gobble, gobble."
I appreciate it when food comes with instructions.
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself!
My wife has been giving me a hard time about my drinking. Eventually, I agreed to quit cold turkey.
Never cared for leftovers anyway.
Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language.
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside
What does Miley Cyrus eat at Christmas? Twerk-ey!
Why don't turkeys like math?
Because when they added three to five...
They got Ate.
---
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?
Enough drumstics for a month.
If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one? Goblet.
What's the best way to stuff a turkey? Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
What would you get if you crossed a turkey with an evil spirit? A poultrygeist!
What do you call a turkey's evil twin?
A Gobblegänger.
Why did the cranberries turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing!
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.