What kind of books do owls read?
Hoo-dunnits.
Did you hear about the birds of prey who opened up a resort?
It was for owl seasons.
Did you hear the gossip about the owl who hooked up with his boss?
I won’t tell you hoo.
What do you get when you cross an owl with an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom.
What kind of gang violence is common among owls?
A drive by hooting.
What sits in a tree and says "Hoots mon, hoots mon?"
A Scottish owl.
What do you can an owl who's been caught in the act?
A spotted owl.
Why did the owl invite his friends over?
He didn't want to be owl by himself.
What's the most common form of owl-on-owl violence?
Drive by hooting.
Why doesn’t an owl study for a test?
They prefer to wing it.
What does an owl with an attitude have?
A scowl.
Did you hear about the birds of prey on black Friday?
It was a free for owl.
What's an owl's favorite Beatles song?
Owl You Need Is Love.
What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
Did you hear about the owl party?
It was a hoot.
Why do owls shower so often?
So they don’t smell fowl.
My pet owl will soon turn 180.
He's not old, he just has a bad neck.
What does a well-educated owl say?
Whom.