What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
An owl had a sore throat but wasn't bothered.
He couldn't give a hoot.
What's an owl's favorite Beatles song?
Owl You Need Is Love.
My dyslexia has reached a new owl.
My wife tried to claim she was a night owl.
She was lying though, because when I tried to turn her head through 270 degrees, her neck snapped.
What did the owl say to the judge?
I’m talon you, it wasn’t me.
Why did the owl 'owl?
Because the Woodpecker would peck 'er.
What is an owl who has been caught called?
A spotted owl.
Why doesn’t an owl study for a test?
They prefer to wing it.
What kind of gang violence is common among owls?
A drive by hooting.
Did you hear about the birds of prey on black Friday?
It was a free for owl.
What is a medieval owl called?
A knight owl.
What is an owl’s favorite Beatles’ song?
Owl you need is love.
Did you hear about the owl party?
It was a hoot.
What did the owl’s valentine say?
You are hootiful.
What sits in a tree and says "Hoots mon, hoots mon?"
A Scottish owl.
What's an owl's favorite subject at school?
Owl-gebra.
Why did the owl join Tinder?
He didn’t want to be owl by himself.