Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.
Why don’t monkeys wear pocket watches?
Because they don’t wear pants.
Why is it a bad idea to get in a fight with a monkey?
Because they use gorilla warfare.
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
If a monkey has thirty bananas in one hand and forty bananas in the other hand, what does he have?
Very big hands.
Where do monkeys go to drink?
To the monkey bars.